Well so here goes. I'm going to spill my guts and be a total girly girl.


Mat and I had our first real date last night. I can't even begin to tell you how much fun I had.

We were supposed to go to Wildlights, at the Columbus Zoo, at like 6, but he had to push back the time because of his paper route. We ended up meeting at like 8:30. The zoo closed at 9, so we just choose one part of the zoo to wander. North America to be exact.

We talked and meandered, and made fun of random little flaws of the zoo and people.

I was kind of nervous, so I told him I was, because I figured it was a good thing to be an honest person (snicker and snort), and that if I got it off my chest it'd be easier. It was.

We ended up finding a little bench in North America, overlooking most of the zoo, and all the lights. We could even see and hear the main light show. I've worked at the zoo 2 summers, and I didn't know that bench or place existed. Go figure. We just sat and talked, and enjoyed the view. It was freezing, but I've never felt that warm in my life.

After not too long we realized it was 5 mins after close, so we headed back towards the entrance, even closer than we were when we came in.
He drove me home.

Yeah, you read that right, my parents actually condoned me getting in another teenager's car, a guy's car.

It surprised me too.
From my house to the zoo is the easiest drive ever, so I just told him where and when to turn. We chatted even more. Eventually we got to my house. The nerves started up again.
I forgot to mention what had happened before we even met up.
Dad brought home a surprise.
In the form of a borrowed shotgun.

Yes, A friggin shotgun.

I wish I was kidding.

I'm not.
He threatened to use it if Mat got handsy, or if he got bad vibes from him.
Oh and he threatened to welcome us home by opening the door with it. Thank god for Mom, she kiboshed that.
However, I didn't know if he was going to open the door with it or not, because I didn't know she'd reigned him in.
I had warned Mat about Dad, and the rest of my family, but failed to mention Prince.

I've lost my house key somewhere in my room, so we ring the doorbell, and Prince come caterwauling to the door, and slams into it. I giggled and said, “oh yeah, We have a 100+ pound white lab named Prince. He sounds like a killer but he's a real sweetheart.”

After some grunting, thumping and swearing mom opened the door with one hand on the dog. She proceeded to introduce everyone quickly, then turn back to decorating. (My house is in full Christmas set up mode)

We sat down and mom and dad where asking Mat random questions while they were decorating.
Not too long after we were there, Anam decided he needed to sit between Mat and I. Not on either of our laps, but between us. And he got peeved that we kept holding hands next to him.


When one kid comes, the other 2 follow. We ended up with Ambrosia on my lap, Anam between us, and Avalon on Mat's lap. I give him credit, for being a teen guy thats never really been exposed to kids, he handled my family exceptionally well.


We'd gotten home around 9:30, and by 10 the rents and munchkins headed to bed. I figured mom's rule for Chris applied for Mat too, and he could stay till 11, and mom didn't say anything so I decided to kick him out at 11.


It was funny, like the second all family was out of the room, Mat changed how he was sitting and pulled me closer. He likes to cuddle, and be close, I love that. We got comfy and spent the next hour flipping back and forth between a football game and a show we both liked, and talking. I showed him some pictures I had on my school computer, and how my school worked, because he was interested.


At 11, I ended up having to kick him out, but then he realized he didn't really know how to get home from here. Dad came down and gave him directions on how to get back to a road he knew. Pretty simple, or so he said. Before he left we talked about hanging out again. He wants to come over all the time. Everyone is ok with that, especially me, but that means I have to be presentable and pretty more often!


I'm a little bummed though, on the 15th he leaves for Brazil. For a month. I cross my fingers and hope being apart for a month won't be a problem for him. I don't care, so as long as he doesn't, we are good.
He's got a tennis tournament this weekend, that I want to go to, but I can't because of Christmas parties on Sunday, and babysitting sibs on Saturday. He might come over after the tournament on saturday though.



I've got butterflies because for once, I actually trust a guy. After everything that's happened, being cheated on, rejected, lied to, hurt and broken, I finally found a guy that's trustworthy. I just can't even tell you how much I want this to last.
Ok. I'm done being a girly spaz. :)
 
XOXOX
Aurora

I tried. I failed. I

I tried.
I failed.
I tried again.
I failed.
I almost lost it all.
I gave up.
Why can't I move on?

Moving On

Alot of things have happened recently.

Most of all, I've changed.

I'm tired of not being good enough for anyone.

I'm changing that.

I WILL lose weight.

I HAVE stopped the bad habit.

I WILL move on.

I will make myself likable.

I don't want sympathy. I don't need sympathy.

I need distractions. From food, from life, from stress, from everything.

I need people to listen when I need to vent, and not judge me. I need people to just hug me and move on.

I'm not a charity case.

Even if I act like one sometimes.

please don't treat me as such.

Surgeries, responsibilities and Birthday Stuffs

This month has been bonkers.

Well as most of you know, Avalon, my youngest sister has to have atleast 2 more brain surgeries, before Christmas.

Avalon had an Lumbar Puncture on Tuesday the 13th of October. This caused a leak in her spinal column, making her central spinal fluid pressure go way too low, instead of being too high. We did not figure this out until Tuesday night, after she came home. Avalon had to go back to the hospital Thursday the 15th for more tests, to determine what surgeries she will need, and when. The whole time she was at the hospital she felt very bad, and had breathing problems while in with her neurosurgeon, Dr.Kosnik.

She came home midday Thursday, and by 7 p.m. that same day, she was heading back to the hospital to be admitted. She was having chest pains, and severe headaches do to extreme low pressure instead of extreme high pressure for once.

She just came home last night, Thursday the 23rd.

She goes in to the hospital for a PIC line on Wednesday the 28th. A PIC line is a cather placed in her upper arm that runs almost straight into her heart. This is needed because all but 1 of her possible spots to have a vein IV were blown. She has to have atleast 2 possible places to have an IV to be able to have the first surgery.

Dr.Kosnik promised Avalon she would be allowed to trick or treat at least once. She will trick or treat on Thursday the 29th, then probably have the first temperal decompression on Friday the 30th. Either she will have it on the 30th, of on Wednesday the 4th, it depends on one of Kosnik's other patients, and his surgery.

Hopefully that cleared up any kind of confusion I've caused lately.

Ok so on to Responsibilities.

While mom has been in the hospital with avalon recently, I've had alot more responsibilities. I don't hate being more responsible, but it is weird. I feel older. I'm not sure how to take it.

Last but not least, Birthday stuffs.

I turn 15 on november 2nd. I'm very excited but in a way, terrified. Time is flying too quick. I feel like I should be turning 14 instead of 15. I start driving in just over a year. That's scary.

Ok so I'm done now.

hopefully I'll be blogging more often, I don't know.

-Aurora

Spiders spiders this big should not be allowed to survive unless in captivity.

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I'm terribly sorry.

I know I'm the only one that ever reads this damn thing, but I'm still sorry to my invisible followers that I haven't posted in so long. Life has been busy, my computer died and I just haven't had the patience to write anything lately.

So I'm now officially going to go into a rant of epic porportions.

I'm so done with the mind games of boys. I'm in love with a guy I've know for almost 2 years. I told him I liked him, and he tells me it's not mutual. I request we carry on like the whole thing never happened, because I don't want to lose him as a friend. He still flirts a bit. He asked if I'm ok.

No.
No, I'm not ok.
At all.

But what can I do? I don't want to lose him. But pretending sucks.

As for John, the kiss and run boy. I hate mind games. Kissing someone twice in the space of a week and a half, then saying we live too far apart to go out is complete and total bullshit. I mean really. He makes me into a dime store whore then goes back on his word. What the hell?

As for my friend's brother....I really like him, I flirt all the time. He flirts back. Yet somehow I am so far into the friend zone it's insane. I don't understand how I got there though....

Boy rant over.

Ok so the Zooaide program is mainly over for the summer. I was accepted as a regionaide for next summer! However.....I was accepted into the Australian Islands region. BLECH!! It was my last choice! I don't understand how I got it. Whatever, I'll deal with the lorikeets. Training is next March, and I need to submit a TB test soon.

The zooaides this year were amazing. Some of the first years were really cool! Olivia and Erik to be exact. Luuuuv them!

Sadly, my computer time has just ended, I shall be back to post more soon though!

Your almost 15 year old friend on the brink of clinical insanity.
-Aurora,

WOOOOHOOO!!!

Finally my laptop came! It works beautifully, although not the prettiest thing in the world.

Swim champs this past Saturday went amazingly!! I dropped 3 seconds on my 50 free, 2 seconds on my 50 back and TWENTY SECONDS on my 100 back!

Wooohoo!!! I'll post more blogs when my computer is 100% done being loaded with all my crap!

Just rambling

Its so good to finally have computer privileges back. I get tired of being grounded very quickly. Just before I got grounded, I finally got a facebook!! Took me long enough to convice mom to let me have one. I also convinced her to.....LET ME GET A HAIR CUT!!!! I'm not talking about the standard trim, no, I mean a full blown, completely new style! We are still in negotiations about exactly what I'm allowed to have. So far I've decided on a shoulder length razor edged main length, then atleast 1 shorter layer as well. I'd like sweeping bangs but that is another fight with mom in itself. I'll be getting it done in a couple weeks. I'll post pictures when I do.

So other than that, my month has been pretty random so far. My family and I went to a Kids n' Camp valentines day party at Magic Mountain earlier this month. It was a TON of fun! Mom invited Rick Smith and his family to come along, because he will be staying with us at Family Camp this coming summer. I'd never met him, but my gosh he and his family were kind! His wife, Lori, and his youngest daughter, Cassie (16), both came with him. They were so unbelievably funny and we clicked instantly. Cassie is totally me in a thinner, prettier body. :)

Valentines day itself was fun for me too. I went to Hannah's house and had a blast with her and Alyssa. Waaaayyy better than going to a bowl-a-thon like the rest of my family. Skip forward a few days, I feel awful because I have the flu, and I was with my friends while being contagious. Thank heavens neither of them got sick!! Missy called to invite me to a Blue Jackets game with her and Hannah on the day I felt the worst. Good thing that by the night of the game I was feeling better, I only sounded like a smoker.

Speaking of the Blue Jackets, the game on the 18th was AMAZING!! My mother is a jinx for the Jackets. Any game she comes to we lose terribly, so she is forever banned from their games. Amazingly the game I go to with Missy and Hannah, we win 4-3 AND Missy and I caught a t-shirt parachute! Hannah got the T-shirt (Missy and I already had it), Missy got the burrito bucks to Chipotle, and I got the parachute. Totally fun, and a great game. Putting three teenage girls hyper off of sugar, a win, and Rick Nash(MISSY!!!), in a small car with a quiet middle aged man is one of the funniest things ever! Quite loud too.

Only bad thing to happen this month, other than me being grounded for most of it, is that Anam had to go to the hospital yesterday. He has the flu still, like me, but much worse. He got so dehydrated that mom took him to the ER to get fluids. It took 3 tries to finally get a vein that didn't explode. He was held overnight for observation. When he got home this morning he seems much better, still sick, but not as bad.

Well I'm off to cough up my left lung.
Xoxo
Aurora

Kill the King (Best quiz ever!)

Sorry it's been a while. I've been super duper busy. I have great news about my last swim meet, I beat ALL my previous times and got a PB sweep! *Happy dances* WOOT!

Now here's the reason I posted a new blog. I swiped this idea off a friend of my mom's blog. Here are the directions.

1. Put your iPod (or MP3 player) on shuffle.

2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY? Worry Rock………. Greenday

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY? From a Mountain in the Middle of Cabins ……………Panic at the disco

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL? Solo Dance…………. Of the CATS musical soundtrack

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE? We will Rock You………. Queen
WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO? Cry To Heaven………….City Of Freaks
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU? Flaming Youth…………… Kiss
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN? Big Balls…………..AC/DC (I swear to god this is what came up...)
WHAT IS 2+2? Photograph………………Nickelback
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND? Dead!………………… My Chemical Romance
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE? Figured You Out……………Nickelback
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY? What I want ……………. Daughtry
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE? Jerry Springer.......Weird Al Yankovic
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU? Born Like This……………..Three Days Grace
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?Girl Next Door………………. Saving Jane
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL? Deep……………City Of Freaks
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST? I can do better………………..Avril Lavigne
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET? Hear Me…………Kelly Clarkson
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS? Sweet Child Of Mine…………………Guns n' Roses
WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN? Cell Phones…………….Foamy the Squirrel
HOW WILL YOU DIE? Another Hole in The Head……………..Nickelback(Little scary)
WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET? Nine in the Afternoon …………….Panic at the Disco.
WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH? Welcome to the Jungle……………… Guns n' roses
WHAT MAKES YOU CRY? You Thought Wrong…………….Kelly Clarkson
WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED? Throw Yourself Away …………………..Nickelback
WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST? Believe it Or Not…………….. Nickelback
DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU? Flaws and All…………….. Beyonce'
IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE? Dirty Little Secret.......All American Rejects
WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW? Sleep……………. My Chemical Romance
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS? Kill The King…………….Megadeath


Friggin hilarious huh?
XOXO
Aurora

Must post

Logan just got his learners permit!!! WOOHOO!!! This is a super big accomplishment, and I'm really proud of him. It took him long enough though, his 18th birthday was last weekend. He failed his written test 8 times before this so I lovingly nicknamed him.....Spongebob!!

He'll lose the nickname after his driving test.

hugs and congratulations to Logan!

:)
xoxo
Aurora

Gay Rights, Teen Celebrities, and more.

Now here's what I'm gonna start doing. Every once in a while I'm going to post a blog filled with random rants, rambles and anything else I feel. This can range anywhere from nationally known stuff, to my hair! Just bare with me and I promise I will make you laugh. (Atleast a little)



Random Rambling Time!! (You should be terrified now)

Celebrity teens-



I can not express how much I hate most teen celebrities. Nothing but a bunch of overpaid, spoiled, stupid, snotballs!!! (Snotball is a technical term, deal with it.) I'm not saying ALL celebrities are like that, not even all teen ones are. But the vast majority fall under the category of overpaid snotballs. For example, Miley Cyrus! I mean really!? She can't sing, she can't act, she's only famous because her dad USED to be able to sing, and face it, she's another Britney Spears in the making! Now I'm not going to say she is ALL bad. Some of her music has a fun beat and some catchy lyrics. Did you see the photo scandals this year? Pfft and the "Jo-Bros" SAY they're "pure" still. (Or they will be until marriage) LIARS!!!



And about them, who has sideburns at 18!? (and doesn't live in 1968) As a stylist-in-the-making, I must say that they dress atrociously! Someone should hunt down their stylist and mother and force them to watch every episode of "What NOT to Wear," seriously. Didn't some one teach them that white skinny jeans and pleather dress shoes should NEVER mix?! I'm not going to diss ALL of their music, because some of it has a relatively good beat. And they have a kick butt stage show. I'm not a huge fan of their voices, but eh. (Now have Good Charlotte sing some of the "Jo-Bro's" stuff and you'll have some good music!)



I am going to out and out say this, I hate Selena Gomez and Demi Lovato. THEY CAN'T SING!!!! Selena has awful hair. It looks like she has a growth on the back of her head! I mean come on, you are rich enough for a better hairdresser. Demi is just not a very pretty person. If you are famous, fix your teeth! and neither of them have any fashion sense either. Demi is a poser punk, and Selena looks like a neon hand-me-down story threw up on her. Sorry If I offended anyone, but if you don't like it, don't read it!



Next ramble-

Gay Rights



It annoys me that so many people STILL think that GBLT shouldn't have the same rights and heterosexuals. California was finally smart enough to allow gay marriage then what do they do? They let people VOTE! Dummies! I just annoys me how many homophobes are out there. Its 2009 people!! Open your eyes and embrace everything and everyone you see.



A few of you are probably wondering why I care so much. Well, my godfathers are gay, and I'm bisexual. *whispers, gasps, gawking* Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever! It also makes me sooo mad i could hit someone, when I hear about FBs, or, fake bisexuals. Those stupid prissy HS girls that pretend to be bi just to make guys go out with them. Most fbs wouldn't even think about kissing someone of the same sex! Fake Bis give REAL bis bad publicity because then most adults think its all a "stage." Here's a thought, it could actually be real!!! And as for "Coming out of the closet" I'm going to quote Chris Crocker on this one-

"If there is a closet full of gay people somewhere, I wouldn't want to come out!!"



Next Rant
Posers


Now before I say anything I must clarify my definition of "Poser." A poser is someone who decides to join a certain group of people. I'd be a poser if i joined a cheerleading team. I hate emo or punk posers. I'm talking the preppy kids who get one bad grade or like one punk/emo song and decide to get piercings and dye their hair. Some people consider me a poser because I dress/act/I am emo. However, I don't have as many piercings as I'd like and my hair isn't cut the right way. (Mom won't let me!) so yah. small rant but I felt like talking about posers.

Xoxox
love and hate you all!
Aurora

Late Christmas Funnies

Just a late tale from christmas...Trust me, you will laugh!

Christmas would have been better if my new laptop, (yes you read that right, LAPTOP) worked! After I opened it, I installed the disk of applications that came with it. Well... I tried to turn it on after it had been charging for several hours and guess what, it's hard drive had completely crashed. So We are sending it back, it will return in a month or so, better than new with extra applications at no extra cost. Woo for making people feel bad! I also got some sweet new books and 2 new watches, that don't fit by the way, and a bunch of drawing books.

Ambrosia and Avalon got American girl dolls for christmas. Please. Kill. Me. Those things are hell in a package. Once you have the dolls, (and a carrying case and outfits like the girls have) you must get the furniture/horses/more clothes/pets/accesories/matching outfits/more clothes that go with them. Which, by the way, are not cheap! (Not saying the ebay laptop was, but I mean buy it once and ur done, with the dolls its a never-ending-expensive-cycle!) I feel bad for mom and dad...what have they gotten themselves into?!

We went to my grandparents house the day after christmas. My aunt and uncle came too. I got a new digital camer and 2 memory cards (That worked, YAY!), a new CD, some new books and a sweet peace sign jewelry set. The girls got portable DVD players each, a new movie each, wireless microphones each (I really hate you for that Net&Darb) and a little mp3 player each. (Why didn't they get these BEFORE we went to Williamsburg!?!?) ((The mp3 players are NOT Ipods, but the girls have decided that's what they are.))

On the way too my grandparents house our car started doing the same thing it did on our way to Williamsburg. SO we figured we had the christmas incident covered for the year. (Grammo and Pappo have a history of something going terribly wrong every christmas. One year their microwave caught on fire, one their pipes froze)

We were planning on staying at my grandparents house for a several days. Plans, however, are NOT set in stone. Everyone was sitting in my gparent's living room except for my grandma, who was in the shower, when the house started to smell awful. We all blamed it on Anam, because face it, he often smells very bad. Mom checked and it wasn't him, right after she announced this the smell got WORSE. I'm talking throw-up-in-your-shoes bad. Pappo (My grandpa) comes hauling butt into the room and throws open the laundry room door. Upon which time he let out a string of words that would have made a sailor cower in fear. From the back bathroom Grammo (grandma) joins in the swearing and comes flying out in a robe with her hair dripping wet.

Meanwhile my aunt figures out why they are so freaked out. My grandparents sewer had backed up and was filling their laundry room floor with, literally, crap. Last time this happened they had to re-carpet the whole house. So my aunt and uncle help start to clean up while mom and i pack like mad people.

Since our van was at the dealership we didn't have a car. (Mind you it took the van and most of Dad's truck to get our stuff down to Dayton. Dad left the night before so he could see to the dog, and the van was un-usable. We had more stuff than what we came with. See our issue?) My grandpa lent us his Saturn View, which although large, not really workable for 3 carseats, 2 adults, and enough stuff for a small country. Dad had taken some of the larger stuff hom with him the night before so we had Ambrosia ride without a car seat, jammed between Anam and Avalon. The back of the View was jam packed, as was under our feet and Ambrosia's lap.

We left Anam's toy train set, and that was it. We learned the next day that Grammo and Pappo are going to have to re-carpet the house AGAIN. My grandma has official christened this Christmas......
"Sh*tmas."
Pretty perfect huh?

So I'm off to go swim my butt off and try to get ready for the next two meets! I have a request though, how about you guys share some random christmas or new year funny of incident?
That's your assignment, take it or leave it!
xoxo
Aurora